Wednesday, February 10, 2010

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Gift or curse!

When I was a kid, I always used to think that is it an offence to take a birth in a female gender? There was a reason behind this thinking. I always saw my mother doing sacrifices for the sake of healthy family atmosphere. I saw my cousin elder sisters losing chances of further studies away from hometown as their brother’s higher studied were more important for the parents. It was a height for me when I saw my doctor brother-in law’s parents demanded money (as society calls it by the name of -Dowry) for their son’s marriage.
I asked my mother that is it a fine that the parents have to pay for giving birth to a girl child? My mother who herself is a teacher just smiled and answered, “Never be ashamed of being a girl, my dear. God has given the strength and special power to us. So be proud of it.” That day I decided that I will never let my self esteem down just for being a girl.
My parents felt always proud for being parents of two daughters. But the society has always been felt sorry for my parents as they don’t have a son. I don’t understand why people still think like this? The outside world is developing at the speed of light and we are not ready to open our eyes and change our mentalities! When I saw my elder cousin sisters crying for the reason of dowry, at that moment I decided that either I am not going marry at all or I will marry that guy who will not demand anything from my father.
I told my decision to my parents and again my mother told me something. She said, “It’s good that you want to change the mentality of our society. But you cannot change the thousand years old tradition, alone. Remember my dear, only few people think like you. People may break your expectations. So be prepared.” I still remember my mother’s words. And now it’s my time to face these things. I really get confused when my would be hubby reacts like an 18th century’s orthodox male chauvinist. At times he is very understanding and sometimes he dominates me just because I am a girl. That time I feel that just because of being a girl I have to listen to the harsh words, the domination and have to forget my own identity. When I complain about this, people tell me to be silent and be patient and learn to accept male domination. Otherwise my relation with my husband will come to an end. According to the society, when you are born as a female, then you are destined to face this. It is thumb rule that a women must always learn to swallow her insults, forget her identity and listen to what her father or brother or husband or son says and behave according to their order. Live according to their wish and forget about her self esteem, self respect and her own perceptions. Will anybody answer to my questions? Is it a punishment of being a girl? Who decided that a women must not have her own perceptions and identity in order to maintain the family atmosphere “HAPPY”? Is it a crime to born as female in 21st century too?

“Have a blast…But watch out for safety!”

“Have a blast…But watch out for safety!”
Celebration is in the air. Everybody has their plans ready to spend the last evening of the year 2009 that is 31st December. One and all want to make the eve special. We all have our different tastes for parties and celebrations. Some people arrange parties at home and some people prefer to go out. And according to their tastes people enjoy parties by dance, music and drinks... Some big hotels, restaurants and clubs organize their special New Year parties. Shopkeepers keep special stocks in market during this time because people tend to go for shopping during this time. Even wine shopkeepers keep special stock as their sale rises to double.
People are very excited about this special evening. Every generation has its own way to celebrate. When asked a teenager, Kshitija Lokhande, 16, she answered that she wanted to celebrate this fabulous eve with her friends but her parents will not allow her to stay out until late night so she will be celebrating New Year eve with her family. According to her parents it is not safe to stay out until late night for girls especially on New Year eve as people may misbehave when they are drunk. But she thinks that her parents are too old fashioned and strict.
There is a generation gap which we can easily see about celebrating 31st December. There is a vast difference of perceptions between two generations. Senior citizens really don’t like the idea of celebrating New Year in this manner. For instance let’s take the example of Mrs. Anjali Gokhle, a retired professor, who says, “We are people who are born in India. It is not our culture to celebrate the New Year is this way. We are blindly following the western people. It is not our New Year even. According to Indian Calendar, we celebrate our New Year on Gudi Padwa and not on 1st of January. And even if the young generation wants to celebrate the New Year on 1st of January then they should not indulge themselves in loud music parties and taking alcohol. It is bad for them and society also. “But today’s young generation does not seem to care about anybody’s perceptions. Gaurav Jog an engineering student says that, “When all the world is celebrating the arrival of New Year on 1st of January, then it is simply a foolishness to ignore and not to celebrate it. We represent a globalized generation and we also must follow the trend. Off course it is bad to drink and drive but I guess there is no harm in celebrating the New Year unless we are not creating problems for anyone. When we know our limits then nobody should create any issue about our celebrations. “
Gaurav’s perception is not wrong. But some people really don’t care about other people around them and the society. They cross their limits and create nuisance for surrounding people. For such people the hotel managers also take very good care that such people should not be allowed to create a scene. The police department gives instructions to all the hotel and restaurant and clubs to take care on such crucial day when any accident can happen. When asked hotel Shivar Garden’s manager, Vijay Uttekar said that , “Every year the police department gives us instructions that for how much time the hotel and bar should remain open and for how much time we can play DJ music. We personally take care that no drunk person in allowed to enter in the premises of hotel and if someone sitting inside the bar seems to drink more than enough then we tell our waiters to not to serve any drink to that person.”
For such nuisance creating people, our police department has all the arrangement. When we asked senior police inspector Mahadev Chavan, chatushrungi police station, said that , “Every year we take good care of safety of people. Our guards are there to help on the road. We put barrels on the road so that no one should drive fast and face the accident. Plus we check that no one should drink and drive. And if someone is found committing such crime, immediate action is taken on them. This year we have arranged female guards on duty too so that we can check for female drunk drivers.”
When so many people are working for our safety then we must act responsible and follow the rules of our sake only. We must not break any rule and create problems for ourselves and people around us. It is our moral duty to respect each other’s safety and liberty. Have a good and safe time. Happy New Year!